Four days until my feet are in Georgia! Before I had Saylor, I was always pretty stoic when it came to "lovey dovey" emotions. Now, however, I find myself being 'touched' by things all the time. Both times I've visited Georgia since I've moved to Oregon, when I see the plane start descending into Atlanta, I can't hold back tears! It's like this big, momentous moment that I look forward to is happening, and I get to look at all of the familiar buildings and streets from above. It's one of the purest moments of nostalgia that I've ever felt.
One time, when I was younger, I was asking my Mom if she ever missed her child hood home; or was it so cool having a house that's YOURS that it outweighs her old home? She told me that it's exciting to have your own house, with your own family- BUT you never really feel that feeling of 'home' like you do when it's your parents house. I TOTALLY get that now. When I come 'home' to my house in Oregon, I feel that 'ah' sigh of relief. I feel relaxed and happy. When I go to my parents house, though, it's just different. It's like... I could be gone for 10 years, but I come back and start right back off where I left in Georgia.
Joe is getting excited too, and surprisingly really getting into the holiday spirit. He does this ADORABLE thing when he gets excited. It's really like a 'tick' almost, because he doesn't realize he's done it until I mention it. He will rub his hands together really fast. It looks almost like he's trying to warm them up, and that's what I thought he was doing when we first got married. I had never noticed it before. I finally asked him one day if his circulation was bad, and if he was having trouble keeping his hands warm (which he does have a problem with sometimes). He looked confused and said, "hm, I think I do that when I get excited about something." So now it warms my heart EVERY time I see him do it. It's this little indicator of 'my man is happy' and he doesn't even consciously realize that he's telling me that. I guess what I'm trying to say is, he's been rubbing his hands together a lot lately, and usually when there's talk of our trip to Georgia. I love it.
I woke up this morning to find 2 wrapped presents of me in the living room. He said I can't open them yet, obviously. So I went ahead and put Luna's and Joe's presents out there as well. We still haven't gotten Saylor's stuff yet! Tsk. We didn't get a Christmas tree this year. You know us, eco-OCD. There are Christmas trees that come in potted plants, that you can reuse, and then when you're ready for a new one, you get to go plant your tree in the ground, so it won't just die. Maybe we'll invest in one of those next year. But where are we going to store an all year Christmas tree? No idea.
Now's the time to start thinking about New Year's resolutions! I usually do weight loss ones. Pretty unoriginal. I am literally the exact same weight I was last New Year. Hahaha. So, I'll be doing something different and much more productive and positive this year. I have actually already started. My intention will be to go a full year without wearing any make up, dyeing my hair, or shaving my underarms and legs! 'Why?' is probably the question you're asking yourself, or maybe you're just rolling your eyes thinking 'she WOULD be doing this' hahaha. Both of those are acceptable responses! So, the reason WHY is this- I (like so many women today) focus WAY too much on my outward beauty. I've come to, personally, notice that the more I focus on how other's view me outwardly, the more ugly I feel on the inside. I'm done hiding behind the facade and mask of make up. I'm tired of giving in to the cultural and societal pressures to be a hairless mole rat. Yeah, okay sure, it looks pretty to have clean shaven underarms. But that's only because that is what we've become accustomed to. I'm letting nature do its thing, the way evolution (or God, if you so believe) intended. Plus, it is super sexist that women have this burden to be the one who has to work really hard in order to appear attractive to the opposite sex (or partner). Now this is all I'm going to say on the subject. Obviously if you're interested and have questions or criticisms alike, I'm open ears, heart, and mind. I really just wanted to put it out there for friends and family (because it shouldn't be a big deal, but... to some people it will be, and that's okay!) in case you get a flash of leg hair, you'll be informed as to why it's there, and it's not because I'm having a mental breakdown.
This affirmation is also proving to be a wonderful addition to my journey of loving oneself.
"I accept myself, unconditionally, right now." Seems so simple, but it's so powerful (and should be true all of the time!)
