So we've been in Oregon a little over a month. Our routine has finally been established and things are really smoothing down. Even though we have been married for a month and a half, at the end of a long day we will sit down, sigh, look at one another and still be shocked that we are where we are. I can vividly remember being 10 years old and looking in the mirror intently at my face. I wanted to know more than anything what I would be like in 10 more years. I couldn't see a grown up, as hard as I tried. Now, I look at myself and I can thankfully still see 10 year old me. Sometimes, I can still talk to her and assure her that she somehow gets everything she wants out of life.
Becoming a parent and getting married has been so rewarding in a countless number of ways, but one of the things I am most grateful for is the immense appreciate I've gained for my own Mom. I FINALLY can comprehend the love and devotion she has for my family. I'm able to understand that her love for me and my brother truly is undying and unconditional, and it's through my love for Saylor that I'm able to understand it.
Saylor is so exciting. She has just started saying 'I love you, Mama,' out of nowhere, without me saying it to her first. It tears my heart in half every time I hear it just because it's almost too painfully sweet for me to handle. She can count to 13 (she has the numbers memorized, at least. Don't ask her to count actual objects), she says 'macamoni' for macaroni, 'piece-a-ghetti' for spaghetti, and 'sayah' for saylor. She is having difficulties with her r's, which may just be due to the fact that's she's 2, but I'm still really trying to work with her on it. We're starting to attempt to introduce her to some Spanish, so I'm super thankful that Joe is almost fluent. (Bear with me, I'm not the type to brag about my daughter, so when I do decide to I try to spit out as much as I can.) Now the cutest, in my opinion, is when I go to get her from her nap or in the morning, she says 'I wake up from my nappy time.' She's my best little friend.
Married life has changed me, for sure. I am.... ORGANIZED! I make lists! All kinds of lists! AND... I am a clean freak?? Who would have ever thought? And the weirdest thing of all is that I like it! The virgo is finally coming out in me, is what my Mom says. But I have really been enjoying being a stay at home mom. Before we got married and moved, doing that stay at home thing was what scared me more than anything. I thought I'd be dying of boredom each day, counting the seconds until Joe would come home so I'd have another adult to talk to, but now I have come to realize that I don't have enough time in the day to get everything done that I need to BEFORE Joe comes home. But I don't slave too much. I divide up chores so I do one part of the house a week. Like Monday: kitchen Tuesday: Living room, etc. etc. Then I take Saylor to the park or on a walk down the street, and it seems like there is ALWAYS something that needs to get done. And when I have finally completed everything on my list I use it for creative time and just do different crafts that are fun to do AND provide some sort of purpose or usage. Like, I made a pencil holder for Joe the other day. And what is really odd to me is that I feel like I move non stop each day. I never sit on the couch and watch TV, EVER, but somehow... every day over dinner Joe will ask me 'So, what all did you do today?' and I can never for the life of me give a response that gives good reason as to what filled up my day. My life is a big mystery even to myself. More posts soon to come........
I moved out to Athens to be with Nicholas when I had Zachary. I was petrified of moving away from everyone I know to be a stay at home mom, and that was only an hour and a half away from home! You chose the complete opposite corner of the country! I applaud your strengths, and I totally understand what you mean about your time during the day. I never realized how much time could go by before I realized it.
ReplyDeleteCasey, this is an excellent blog and such a wonderful idea. Great way to keep us all connected. Thank you so much for the sweet comments. It's so very true that you don't have ANY idea of a mother's love 'til you're in that position. I see that deep love you have for Saylor and know she will understand that more fully when she has her own kids, as well. The "piece a ghetti" had me rolling! Man, I miss you guys so much and am COUNTING the days 'til Sept 21. As per earlier comment, just imagine it's you going to see Saylor newly married way across the country and you'll see a glimpse!! Love you so much and am prouder than I can even say. Ma <3 <3 <3
ReplyDeleteMy mother used to quote that old adage, "A woman's work is never done" and it is so true. Running a household can be both overwhelming and rewarding. I am so glad you are settling into a routine and having those special momements that are, what I believe, life is really all about.
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